“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.”
-Galatians 5:22-23
As we continue our study through the fruit of the Spirit, we come to “gentleness.” As is the case with each of the other fruits, gentleness stands in striking contrast to the world around us. We will first try to describe the concept of gentleness as it is used in scripture, and then we will study its application in our own conduct.
Most of us are taught the meaning of “gentle” from a young age. It is human nature to be rough, and parents almost unceasingly remind their children, “Be gentle with that!” Without that reminder, children will act like tyrants, breaking anything remotely fragile or unintentionally hurting other people. It is appropriate then, that God would instruct us as His children to behave with gentleness. It is easy to see the relationship between gentleness and the other descriptions of the fruit of the Spirit, such as love, peace, meekness, and temperance.
While the general meaning of gentleness is almost universally understood, there are subtleties that our culture often gets wrong. First, gentleness is not at all the same as weakness. God Himself is described as gentle in leading the young in the same context in which He is described as coming “with strong hand” (Isaiah 40:10-11). In fact, gentleness is often a trait exhibited by the strong. A physical world analogy would be a truck pulling a heavy load. A truck with a larger motor will operate more smoothly and gently than a truck with a motor just barely large enough to do the job.
Also, gentleness does not in any way demonstrate a lack of wisdom. On the contrary, godly wisdom is described as gentle in James 3:17, harmonizing with Jesus’s instruction to be “wise as serpents, but harmless as doves” (Matthew 10:16).
Finally, the gentleness described in scripture imitates the gentleness of Jesus. Of course, Jesus is not weak, unwise, or compromising with the ways of sinfulness, but Paul besought the Corinthians “by the meekness and gentleness of Christ” (II Corinthians 10:1). What a wonder it is that Jesus, Who is God manifest in the flesh, loves and gently sustains His people in this world. Consider His word to His people: “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30).
When we contemplate the application of gentleness in our own conduct, an objection may arise. In a culture that idolizes rough, gruff, “manly men,” gentleness does not fit very well in our understanding of masculinity. However, scripture teaches very plainly that men ought to bear this fruit just as abundantly as women. In fact, the charge is given to the fathers to bring children up in “the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). Truly, men ought to be strong and watchful, but not to the degree that they have no ability to be gentle. Is a nurturing and gentle countenance part of a masculine character? It ought to be!
In our behavior as disciples of Christ, we can consider part of Paul’s charge to Timothy to “be gentle unto all men” (II Timothy 2:24). A specific example of instruction in gentleness is given in Proverbs 15:1: “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.” When someone has said or done something offensive, our fleshly nature wants to rise up and put them in their place. Often, the first thing we think to say would be insulting and harmful, sometimes even resulting in the loss of a friend. What valuable wisdom is contained in giving a soft answer! The blessings of God (His truth, His church, our family and friends, etc) are far too precious to handle them in any way other than with gentleness.
I will close with this thought: when we esteem something highly, we handle it gently. As an example, many people have “work clothes” and “formal clothes,” which are each used for their particular purpose. Extra care is taken with the formal clothes because of their recognized value. Applying this logic to discipleship, we openly declare our love and esteem for God and our brethren when we bear forth the fruit of gentleness. May God bless us to take heed, humble ourselves, and be gentle as we ought!